CAUTION :: WUSSISHNESS AHEAD :: CAUTION

Note: All of the things said here after are the words of someone who loves his child dearly, and understands that no one is going to love him like we do, nor should they have to. These are just my observations and emotions while trying to make it past this hurdle in parenthood.

Today was my man's first day at daycare.

Yeah, I cried...shutup.

It sucked, man...Having to go in there and completely place my trust (and son) in to the hands of complete strangers is scary and heart-breaking.

I know...I know...it will be good for his development, social growth, mental growth, etc. It gets him out of the house more, and out of our usual routine for him, which I think is probably the biggest boon for all of this; as well as he will be interacting with more than just his mom, his dad, and his grandma...so I know its good. Just hurts.

I think it really comes down to a few things. Obviously, they don't care for him as much as I do, so he won't receive as much attention, but secondly...I don't think they really appreciate him.

That is to say, when I look at him, all I can see is this amazing child, my child, that I think is so wonderful and beautiful and funny. He has the most awesome laugh, a smile that literally lights up a room and would melt the heart of a pissed off Hitler.

Really.

The way he squeals when we play Peek-A-Boo on the carpet. How he is always entranced by ceiling fans and will stare at them in complete amazement. These people know none of these things, and I get this image in my head of seeing him trying to initiate these games, or show off that beautiful smile to these people, and they just pass him right by, never even noticing, and the disappointment he feels at that.

Now, having said all that, I know the world isn't a beutiful place, and I know that he needs to have some reality that the world doesn't revolve around him. He needs to know that there are other people in this world who aren't just interested in wiping his ass and plugging bottles into his mouth. I know this...but I just wish he didn't have to learn it at 8 months old.